🤙Still Stoked After All These Tears
Aside from a few minor scrapes, a slightly sunburned forehead, and a very questionable tan line, I haven’t had any serious injuries related to my new favorite hobby—surfing.
Probably because I’m somewhat risk-averse. Sure, I surfed outside my comfort zone when my friend was in town. It’s easier to take risks when you’ve got a buddy looking out for you in the water.
But since he left, I’ve been sticking to my beloved Beginner’s Bay—where there are also a few surf schools and droves of people. The crowds can be annoying AF, but they add a layer of comfort when you’re a kook getting your bearings.
A few days ago, however, I landed in El Tránsito—a much smaller, quieter surf village about three hours north—where I’m teaching yoga in exchange for a room on the beach. While the waves are far less crowded here, they are also very different than what I’m used to. I won’t bore you with offshore vs. onshore wind, or beach break vs. reef break lingo—you’ll just have to take my word for it.
Though I managed to catch one decent wave, it was one hell of a bumpy ride.
I decided to go out for another (insert ominous doomsday sound effect👇).
Except this time, I kept getting pounded by the whitewash. I haven’t learned how to “duck dive” yet, so I was out there doing sloppy turtle rolls. And when I wasn’t turtle rolling, I was taking waves straight to the face like a salty slap. Sometimes, there was another wave right behind it, ready to deliver a surprise encore assault.
With saltwater oozing out of every orifice, I couldn’t help but laugh. Where in the hell was I? And why had I left my Popoyo paradise for this?
When I couldn’t take the abuse anymore, I got out of the water, and immediately noticed something didn’t feel right. There was a sharp pain in my right rib cage.
My First Injury
After way too much internet research and texting my new nurse friend, I’ve concluded it’s probably a rib fracture. Apparently, it’ll take up to six weeks to heal.
Yep. That means no surfing for SIX WEEKS.
I wish I could say I was doing something totally tubular to earn this injury, like getting barreled, but nope—I was paddling. Literally just paddling. I don’t even know how it happened, which is disconcerting because that means it could easily happen again.
Real Talk
When I’m injured or unwell, I can’t help but feel like a failure. I take a lot of pride in how I nourish and care for my body. Surfing has deepened that connection—I’ve never felt so strong in all my 37 years.
And in one second, that feeling melted (much like the makeshift ice pack currently tucked under my tank top).
So then, how do I move forward? How do I find joy in this new normal?
I have to take my own advice, that’s what. Luckily, I wrote a book about it. LOL.
My book, Exiting the Matrix, is filled with tips on how to leave the grind and build a more authentic life. A lot of it is geared toward people who want to live alternatively, embrace minimalism, and swim upstream from mainstream society.
But what if you can’t just up and leave your country and start a new life abroad? What if you have a weak passport, no savings, a chronic illness, a family to care for, or a pesky rib injury? Should you be temporarily denied the inherent joy we are born to experience?
Absolutely not.
That’s why I also address the mental Matrix in my book—the invisible traps that prevent us from accessing joy. And now? Now I have to take my own advice.
Since I started surfing, I unknowingly began outsourcing my joy. I became hooked on the high of catching a wave, letting it dictate my happiness. But the cold, hard truth? That kind of dependency meant I was still stuck in the Matrix.
Why?
Because anytime you rely on something external—a job, a relationship, a vacation, a new car, a perfect meal, or a rideable wave—to bring you joy, you're still plugged in.
But don’t fret—there’s always a way out.
Untangling yourself from the craving for external highs takes time. But the moment you start choosing peace over the chase? That’s when the real freedom begins.
Silver Linings - The Way Out
I once heard that you can’t feel grateful and disappointed at the same time. So instead of wallowing in my own misery for five weeks, I'm finding other things to be grateful for, like:
I finally have time to tie up the loose ends on my book and start promoting it.
I have mental space to craft a coaching program and/or build a community of curious misfits who want to exit the Matrix.
The clarity and focus to deepen my yoga practice
A fresh perspective on The Matrix—and the chance to truly practice detaching from external “hits” of happiness and cultivate joy from the inside out
I can fall in love with walking again.
The Warm, Soft Truth
There is joy to be found absolutely everywhere—no matter what state your body is in, how much is in your bank account, or where you are in the world. Once you understand this, you’ll stop chasing the high and start recognizing the magic in the mundane.
Because freedom isn’t just found in faraway places or perfect wave conditions—it’s found in the way you choose to meet the moment, especially when that moment is less than tubular (and involves a busted rib and a bruised ego).
My book, Exiting the Matrix, is currently in the editing phase, and the cover’s getting its final polish. Want to be the first to know when it drops? Sign up here to get on the list.