Does Sharing Your Values and Beliefs Feel Scary? Read this.
I follow someone on social media who is slightly younger than me but on a similar life journey as me. Sometimes she posts stuff, usually quotes or passages from a book, and my first response is to cringe (even when I’ve read most of the same books and love the quotes she shares.)
How could she make herself look so….vulnerable? Why doesn’t she just keep it to herself?
When this happened recently though I stopped myself. Since everyone you don’t like is supposedly mirroring something you don’t like about yourself, I decided to investigate deeper. Upon doing so I realized that I was jealous that she dared to share her values and beliefs with her followers. Once I realized what I had been doing, I asked the universe to give me the courage to start sharing my values more openly.
A week prior, I had received inspiration to create a survey and ask my social media followers to answer a survey about a topic I am very passionate about, exciting the matrix/status quo, but I hadn’t done anything with it yet. This was my time to tell the universe I was ready.
Once created, I easily shared the survey on LinkedIn (I don’t know why but I am so detached from that platform. I don’t care at all who reads my posts there and therefore it is super easy to share whatever.) I waited a few minutes and then decided to post on Facebook. Also fairly easy.
I then closed my MacBook and went for a hike, I didn’t want to see who did or didn’t respond. I wanted to enjoy the French Pyrenees while I had them outside of my door. A little while later my BFF texted me and said, “Share your survey on Instagram, tag me and I’ll share it.” I immediately wrote back, but I’m shyyyyyyy. ok, I’ll do it!
I didn’t linger in worry too long though because folks started submitting their answers to my survey and I felt an instant rejuvenation to keep sharing my beliefs more openly. I am so grateful to have BFFs who regularly light a fire under me and encourage me to step consistently out of my comfort zone.
I learned a very valuable lesson through this experience, one that I am about to share now…
As soon as you start living your values (not just talking about them), you are telling the universe that you are ready for the abundance you are about to receive.
Case in point - I recently had a call with a project in Portugal, an eco-village outside of Faro that’s been on my radar for a while. The call was to discuss a potential work/trade. In exchange for helping them with their marketing outreach for a few months, I would receive a deed to a parcel of land….in freaking Portugal…in a freaking Eco Village.
It’s not a done deal yet, but I am convinced it will go through, and also that I’m worth receiving it.
I am not telling you this as an adult version of one-upping you. Nor am I typing this whilst sticking my tongue out and mumbling “nanny, nanny, nanny.” I am merely suggesting that when you take a bold leap and start LIVING your values (not just talking about them), when you start taking actual tangible steps towards realizing your dreams, and when you take risks, BIG risks, the universe delivers an opportunity seemingly overnight that will prove just how magical and creative of a being you truly are. You see I am a BIG fan of work/trade and it’s one of the principles I want to discuss in the book because it’s the easiest way I know to start building a freelance portfolio when you don’t have a lot of experience and also the most fun way to say F-U to the man. But I never in my wildest dreams thought it would be possible to trade my marketing services for land. Until now.
That’s the Universe’s way of one-upping me, I guess. Well played, universe, well played.
Are you afraid of sharing your beliefs? Do you cringe when others do it? Have you ever thought about WHY?
Answer These Questions to Determine What You Want in Life
While friends and former partners are marrying and/or starting families, I’ve been busy riding roller coasters and pretending to be a T-rex at a Polish supermarket appropriately named “Dino”. For anyone who was wondering, it was a scavenger hunt put together for a friend’s birthday weekend, and boy was it fun. Turns out you don’t need to birth children to partake in ridiculous affairs.
Next year - the fun doesn’t stop. In January I have plans to surf in Morocco, hike the Pyrenees, and start exploring the South of Spain in my minivan.
As exciting as my life is, every now and then doubt creeps in, usually after seeing a cute photo of a friend’s baby swaddled like a sausage on Instagram. Or when another friend sends me a photo of the king-size bed she and her partner just purchased. “Cozy,” I respond. Deep down I’m thinking “Sure beats the 70 euro piece of foam I just purchased for my van on Amazon.”
Am I really where I want to be?
Am I really creating the life of my dreams and enjoying the unfolding of it all?
Am I laying the groundwork for who I want to be in five years?
Before I completed the exercise I will soon share below, I wasn’t sure what I wanted from life. Sometimes I felt like living an adventurous life for the rest of my life and sometimes it sounds nice to settle down, raise a little family, and sleep in a ridiculously giant bed with animals snuggled around. What was I to do? Well, I did what anyone going through an existential crisis might do and I enlisted the help of the internet. I Googled something like, “how to know what you want in life”.
That’s when I found a list of questions and spent some time answering them thoughtfully. Afterward, I understood that yes, I am headed in a good direction. I am excited about life on the road and spending time in a climate where the sun is not an anomaly. The exercise helped me get clear about the kind of life I want for myself and validated some of the recent actions I’ve taken to achieve those things. In other words, I am indeed laying the groundwork for a more fulfilled future me. Yippee!
If you have been comparing yourself to others, feeling stuck in life, or unsure about what you want to prioritize in the new year, I highly recommend taking some time for yourself to answer the following questions. Not only will it help you figure out what you want in life but it will also help you determine whether or not your current habits are supporting your ideal future you.
Questions to Determine What You Want In Life
What makes me happy?
What are my needs? Physical, emotional, financial
What are my personal values? Factor in money, travel, hobbies/interests, animals, mental and physical health, time allocation, consistency, communication style
What gives me purpose?
What activities put me in a flow state?
What would I do if there were no limits? Think about the following…
What would I rather be doing?
Who do I want to spend my time with?
Who do I want to help?
Am I in the right location to do what I want to do?
What am I willing to sacrifice to achieve my goal?
How do I define a “good life?”
Who do I admire or get jealous of?
How do I envision the patterns of my life?
What don’t I want?
What drains me mentally and emotionally
What makes me sad
What causes me pain
What are my greatest accomplishments in life?
Since I’ve answered these questions, I’ve also started creating secret boards on Pinterest of homes, clothes, and places labeled “future me”. It’s a virtual vision board that will help me visualize and hopefully manifest some of the goals I’ve yet to attain. If you are serious about making the most out of life, I HIGHLY recommend you do the same!